Younger and older gay
Gay Relationship Advice: Age Gaps in Same-sex attracted Relationships
Many of my LGBTQ counseling clients ask me why they are only attracted to queer men younger than themselves. If you are happy digital dating gay men in their twenties, then this question is not important. It&#;s like asking &#;Why do I like blondes over brunettes?&#; My advice is to let yourself enjoy dating whomever interests you (as long as they are over the age of 18).
Age gap relationships are more common than you may see. In western countries:
- 1 out of every twelve male/female couples has an age gap of 10 years or more
- that number increase to 25% in male/male couples
- and 15% of female/female relationships
That alike study indicated that age gap partners are more satisfied and more dedicated to each other than partners of similar age–though there is some explore that points to a correlation with higher rates of divorce. Research also shows that couples with an age gap of less than ten years are happier than those with an age gap greater than ten years. You can locate more details on these stats on this episode of the pod
Gay Relationship Advice: Navigating Age-Gap Relationships
I’ve been an LGBTQ+ Affirmative Therapist for nearly ten years, and quite often, the topic of age differences comes up with my single queer-identified male clients and quite often is present in the same-sex couples or families I work with. Here are some of my thoughts and ideas in the form of some gay relationship suggestions.
Age differences in homosexual men in a lovey-dovey relationship is a very frequent phenomenon but is still one that often raises questions or concerns in my clients as a topic and sometimes requires some navigation in same-sex attracted couples therapydue to the unique relationship dynamics involved.
Find our more about what therapy for gay men is like with me here.
If you're curious about your relationship, I just created anLGBTQ+ Relationship Interrogate to help queer couples identify blindspots and development points and to commemorate strengths. It's totally free and I'll email you a free 15 page PDF breakdown of your results.
One of the things this quiz looks at is 'balance' which is al
11 Ways to Find an Older or Younger Male for a Relationship– Lgbtq+ Age Gap Dating Advice
When it comes to attraction, a large age gap brings with it numerous nuances. One of arguably the biggest hurdles to overcome is the first. How to meet an older partner or younger partner?
From finding a fling to discovering marriage material, for gay men, actively finding a partner that’s significantly older or younger can feel much more difficult than for those seeking those similar to their age.
Aside from the reduced number of people genuinely interested in dating someone 15 years, 20 years, 30 years + apart from them (like TheAgeGapGuys have), location plays the biggest part. This isn't meaning physical distance between people – though that naturally impacts relationship sustainability – but the long term location (i.e. where you reside and work) of the person seeking to get together an older / younger man.
Your location impacts an enormous array of things for gay men, including but not limited to:
The legality of homosexuality
Liberalness and acceptance of gay peo
Thomas Gass, a dentist in California, has survived the curse—twice. The curse? Gass is a male lover man whose only sexual attraction is to men significantly older than he is.
Gass lost his first partner, 28 years his senior, through the slowly decaying effects of Lou Gehrig’s disease after they had been together for 13 years. After recovering from his grief, he set up love again with a guy 18 years older but endured another tragic loss when his second partner died of pancreatic cancer after they had spent 17 years together. Still a relatively young man, Gass might wonder whether or not to take a chance on loving an older man again. For him, however, the choice is between an older man or no man at all. Gass and his friends—all of whom had lost older life partners—have labeled their abiding sexual attraction “the curse of being attracted to older men.”
I began to study same-sex relationships with age disparities while conducting research for my book, Finally Out: Letting Go of Living Straight. Gass and I started to correspond after he and his friends had read and discussed my essay